Changing the narrative

"Do not use excuses as to why you cannot do something," says Dear Alli columnist.

by Allison Blaylock
Transgender Advice Columnist

Alli,

I'm tired of being defined by bathroom bills, discrimination and controversy. How can we redirect the narrative in this world of change?

Terra

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Dear Terra,

I know that the current mood in the community right now is surrounded by the bathrooms, changing rooms and locker rooms. We are constantly seeing people coming up with all sorts of negative aspects about the transgender community. The transgender community is the main focus on all issues for one reason or another as we see things right now.

This focus turned to our community when marriage equality was ruled upon at the Supreme Court level. Once a decision such as this was made people had to find a way to continue to push their own personal agenda. The unfortunate group that got put in the crosshairs was the transgender community.

Many people throughout the country try to use religion as a reason for this push, yet they do not realize that there are some aspects within the teachings that accept the transgender community. The transgender community is one that is new to the focal point which means we are going to be getting the largest amount of attention, and yes, this means we are getting the worst portion of it.

The LGBTQ community is still having bills brought forth to allow for discrimination. Much of this is based on the aspects of religious beliefs. The one thing that is not truly looked at with this is that it will even cause discrimination against those who are making the bills.

The best way, in my opinion, is that you must be active in everything that you do. Do not use excuses as to why you cannot do something. I would suggest that instead of calling political figures about issues that transgender individuals set up a meeting with them. This requires them to actually sit down and discuss topics while looking at you. I found that when they saw me as a normal everyday person that it took the fear of the unknown out of it.

You can also make sure that your voice is heard by voting. Many times, people only vote on the level of president, governor and high positions. The local and smaller elections are much more or equally as important within local communities.

I will also add that by sending out hateful and rude comments to those who do not understand doesn’t help our case at all. The LGBTQ community is supposed to be a group of acceptance and compassion. We should realize that people who do not understand need to be shown some compassion as they need to learn.

This is truly a tough time for the transgender community. We are the focal point and these hateful bills that are being pushed are directed because of the fear of assaults in a bathroom. The number of transgender people who are assaulted is much higher than that of any transgender person assaulting others.

You do not have to be a walking billboard stating you are transgender, though it is never a bad thing when you do. Own the situation and move forth in the activity with confidence. When you show confidence, people see you as someone who can handle themselves.

This fight is ongoing and we have to be ready to continue fighting. We cannot run and expect to win every battle and in many cases, we may lose a lot of them. We must focus on the end and keep pushing for equality for the trans community.

One last thing that I would suggest is to find local groups in your area that help fight for the equality of the LGBTQ community and let them know you want to be someone that can and will help. Finally, do what you say you are going to do.

Keep your head high and keep being you.

Alli

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Allison Blaylock