Marriage equality senior love story

By Bruce Hartley
Life Issues Columnist

This story began four years ago when a fifty-something gay man discovered online dating phone apps.

I found Bill on the dating app by the name of Growlr. I found this new way of meeting people funny, and I was surprised how many other LGBT+ people my age were looking for a special someone.

Bill and I had our first date at a breakfast restaurant, and we had an instant connection. We started dating which was scary for me as a senior adult. I had recently come out to my family, but Bill wasn’t out to his family. Dating him was interesting to navigate as I wanted to respect his privacy but was excited to enjoy our relationship and didn’t want to live in the closet.

We agreed to be monogamous partners a few months later. We both went to the health department and obtained our bill of health to share with each other.

Next came rings. We decided to buy each other partner rings, and by then Bill had come out to his family. I’ll never forget the photos we took of our hands and posted on Facebook to celebrate along with the feedback we got from people asking if we got married. Sadly, marriage wasn’t possible for us as we lived in Missouri and Oklahoma in 2014 we couldn’t legally get married.

After more than a year together, we were excited to watch as more states started recognizing marriage equality. I will never forget hearing the SCOTUS announcement on June 26, 2015 marriage equality was the law in every state in America. It was something that I didn’t think would happen in my lifetime.

I remember reading the social media postings both pro and con for marriage equality. Bill and I learned quickly who supported us and who didn’t.

Now we could start serious marriage discussions. Bill and I agreed we would wait to get married until his kids graduated from high school. Over the past few years, we have merged our two families during holidays and special occasions, and together we have seven kids. We are somewhat of a modern-day Brady Bunch.

Last December; I decided it was time to officially pop the question since his youngest son would graduate from high school in May 2019.

Since we both love Christmas; I decided to propose to Bill during a family trip to Old Time Christmas at Silver Dollar City in Branson, MO. I waited until dark so that I could propose with Christmas lights in the background.

Before I knew it, I was down on one knee, and Bill was looking at me like I was a crazy person. My asking him was a complete surprise. I popped the question, and he accepted. We both cried.

I let my family know when and where and they videotaped and took pictures, and random park visitors cheered for us. It was a beautiful night and a special memory we will never forget.

Now, we are making plans for the wedding. We have many ideas for our wedding, reception and honeymoon. We hope to tie the knot in late 2019 officially and couldn’t do it without marriage equality. I hope all senior LGBTQ people can find their soul mate. Be sure and take a moment to smile as together we celebrate the third anniversary of marriage equality on June 26.

Copyright The Gayly 6/26/2018 @ 12:08 p.m. CST.